Reality Check- How often do your adult kids call each other?

Every parent believes that their own kids are wonderful, special, and get along great.    After all, you fondly recall seeing your adult kids and their families getting along so nicely with each other around your table last Thanksgiving.  So, naturally, this blog post can’t apply to you… well, keep reading anyways.

Because the reality is that the courthouses are full of great families fighting over inheritances.

The bottom line is that Inheritance is poison, and don’t think that your adult children are immune to it.  Many better parents, with better families, made this grave mistake –and are now paying a terrible price for it.

The reality is that most children have issues between them.   Sibling rivalry is not just over a piece of cake, and it doesn’t end when they leave the house.

Disparities in your children’s income level, job success, marital status, and children – can cause real jealously and animosity between them.  Of course, no one wants to upset you, so everyone laughs and are chummy when you around you.

So, how can you tell whether your adult children like each other and get along?

My answer is simple- find out how often they call each other.  Do they speak once a week?  If not- then find out, “why not?”  Are they really so busy with their lives that they really cannot pick up the phone and call each other- at least once a week? Maybe, the answer is “yes”, or maybe they have issues between them.

Why is this important?  Because, many of the fights over inheritance and eldercare issues could have been resolved early-on by good communication between family members.  Therefore, if your children are not calling each other- then help them reach out and connect.  After all, if they are not talking to each other now, when you are strong and healthy, then how can they be expected to talk to each other when the “heat is on” and they have to navigate very sensitive and important issues about you, your care, and their inheritance.

Remember- good communication is the key to help families save themselves from poisonous inheritances and eldercare issues.